mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 20, 2008 2:01:32 GMT -5
Hey, man!
Thanks! I'm surprised I'm actually having fun writing this! I really appreciate the compliments. I wrote the first part this morning---exhausted from work and personal issues. Afraid I channeled a bit of Donaldson in the first epi heh heh heh.
thanks indeed for the praise, it means a lot
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 20, 2008 1:44:07 GMT -5
The old road was unpaved and rock-choked, the water-smoothed stones thicker than cobblestones in the dull, grey dirt. It looked quite dry to Christian, so he drove on, down the winding way with confidence. Only when there came a heavy rain would there be need for vigilance. Still, he drove slowly and precisely, taking time to calm down. Olli was already gathering up the few possessions he always carried with him, wherever he went: the folded wallet, the pewter anchor, his cell phone. Christian sighed, and felt his tension begin to subside. The gnawing anxiety, well, he'd deal with that later.
"Almost there! Are you going to stop at the Mill?", Olliver said through his boyish grin. He looked so handsome, so desirable at that moment, Christian couldn't help but smile in response. "Go ahead and stop, Christian. I need to pickup a few things." He began to peer into the gloom, watching for the narrow road to appear on the right that led to it.
"Yeah. I told them we'd check-in before going to the ..., before going on," Christian responded. He kept a smile plastered to his face, stoically ignoring another adrenaline pulse that nearly took his breath. I order you to be calm, he recited to himself. You're being ridiculous. There's nothing to be nervous about. Chill out! But it was no use. Finally, he decided to just focus on the darkling drive along the twisted, tree-lined road. Within moments, the side road appeared and his rebellious heart relented as he maneuvered the BMW thereon.
This road was actually paved, the only one on the campground. There was even an old, routinely neglected street light---though it was hung from a huge sycamore rather than the modern, steel pole one would expect. The pavement inclined ahead, turning this way and that up a domed, wooded hill and he followed the way slowly, with sheer determination. But it wasn't the effort which taxed his will, only his unrelenting anxiety about what lay ahead.
Finally, after what seemed hours, but of course only actually a few minutes, the old, quaint building emerged from the forest dark, lit-up like a fairy castle with open-flame torches and thick candles in the many windows.
"Ahh, just like I remember it. Wonderful.", said Olli. As Christian pulled into the tiny parking lot and brought the shuddering BMW to a grateful halt, he felt Oll's arms grab him in a strong hug. His scent filled his senses and, as always, he was conquered. The warmth between them was a benison for his chafed nerves and harried volition. Without thinking, he hugged Olli back, and just leaned against him for a few moments, re-gathering his spent vigor. "What a great idea, man. I think we both could use a little free-time. Just what we needed.", said Olli. He moved away and opened the door, quickly stepping out. "Come on, Christian. You need a break, too."
Christian watched him march inside, smiled briefly and climbed out after him. He caught up quickly, strode into the old-fashioned shop and looked around. There were a few other campers already shopping---no doubt stocking up for the few days that they, like he and Olliver, would spend here. There were may cabins spread across this old, wooded farm, Christian recalled, though they were set haphazardly far away from each other. Thus, creating a sense of privacy and remoteness, if not actual, he smirked to himself. And this old shop was the only one nearby carrying anything anyone could want for a weekend camp-out. An old couple owned and ran not only this supply-shop, but the entire campground. They were 'the Millers' and had been here forever, apparently.
Christian smiled to himself. He and Olli had come to call this little grocery, 'the Mill' whenever they reminisced about that first camping trip they'd had had, so long ago. Just because the owners were named, the Millers. Come to think of it, he'd never found out it's actual name. Right at this moment, however, he didn't care. He was just content to be out of the car and away from his chivying fears.
Christian saw old man Miller sitting off to the side, before a huge, archaic hearth, smoking a pipe as always. While Olli wandered here and there picking up who-knew-what, he decided on impulse, to greet the old-timer. He'd never really spoken to him before, on his last visit. Just let me sit down a few minutes, get it together, he was thinking as he did just that.
Across from him, Mr. Miller looked up briefly and nodded formally. The blue smoke from his old, carven pipe was sucked instantly into the flue, but the leathery smell of it was all around him, carried outwards by the welcoming warmth. Christian nodded back, in absolute silence. Hearing Olliver's voice in animated discussion with Mrs. Miller made him stare fondly at him for a moment. Bluntly, his attention snapped back to the old man and he realized that courtesy dictated a greeting.
"Good evening, Mr. Miller. I hope you and Mrs. Miller are doing well..", he muttered. It took more effort than he thought it would, being social. His mind was on Olliver and he couldn't shake away his endlessly spinning thoughts. He sighed with a throaty breath and scanned the ceiling for a relief which did not come. He shook his head at his own useless frustration.
Mr. Miller, moving with practiced grace, each gesture precise and deliberate, carefully tamped the consumed tobacco from his pipe on a brick above the crackling flames, never taking his vapid eyes off of Christian's face. The charred remnants cascaded, trailing dying sparks, into the fiercer hearth-fire and were disintegrated instantly. His hoarse, graveled voice drew Christian's eyes from the sight. "We're doing as best as can be, I expect. Unlike you, I shall venture to say." His white eyebrows arched knowingly as he continued, "You must tell me, young man, why is it each time I see you, you have the look of someone afflicted beyond mortal tolerance. Do not suppose that I am so old I cannot remember the unbridled passions of naive youth. But you seem troubled even more than is wont for someone with so few years behind him." His laughter came then, dry and rich with self-amusement.
Christian stiffened and spoke coldly, "Meaning no disrespect sir, but I have no idea what you're talking about..." He made it half-way out of the old, cushioned chair which had begun to ease him so well when the old man taciturnly waved him back. To his astonishment, he complied with the unspoken command.
"But I think you do. I think you are in love. And, absolutely terrified.", declared Mr. Miller.
Christian felt sure his involuntary gulp, his choked gasp was loud enough to be heard across the entire shop. All he could do was gape, his heart pounding, throbbing in his own ears. He had no idea what to say. He could not think or speak....
to be continued....
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 19, 2008 12:15:12 GMT -5
heh
Thanks, soz
Just wanted to show a scene of normalness (yeah, not a real word). I appreciate the compliments. Been writing one or another all my life, basically. Prefer writing poetry, lyrics---but now and again something hits me to write a story.
I'll try to continue. Maybe if I can catch up some sleep heh.
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 19, 2008 10:22:04 GMT -5
Afternoon traffic in Düsseldorf was nearly enough to drive Christian crazy with impatience, but he only let a surly grimace show on his face when Olliver wasn't paying attention. He wasn't going to do anything to spoil the fun. It had taken so much time and effort to make this little excursion possible! Two weeks of non-stop study at the Uni and even more, though definitely of a different kind, at the boxing gym. His face nearly snarled when he thought about boxing and the gym, but he covered it quickly enough, he thought, by a needless horn-blow and shout at the driver ahead of them.
"What's wrong, then?", said Olli beside him. His keen eyes looked from Christian towards the auto creeping along right in front of them, and back again. His glance was discerning, missing nothing. But his laugh-filled expression never changed and Christian's irritation vanished when he saw it.
"If this idiot doesn't get out of my way, I'm running him off the road," he said, turning his head away from Olli's face towards the offensive, lemon-yellow sedan blocking the road before them. He scowled convincingly at the unknown, oblivious driver and hit the horn again.
He felt Olli's hand on his shoulder for a moment, just a quick, reassuring touch, at once tender, but strong. His rigid grip on the wheel relaxed at that touch.
Through untroubled laughter, Olliver smirked, "Yeah, and if you don't watch out, we'll have to buy Lydia a new car. Not that she would mind very much, I guess." His voice was thick with humor and Christian remembered the conversation with Lydia this morning as well and smiled at the memory. She had been only too happy to donate her vehicle for their weekend get-away and had even expressed a hope that something 'accidental' would rid her of 'that over-priced, gas-guzzling piece of junk'.
At last, the traffic jam unsnarled itself in the unknown distance by unseen means, the chaos and noise dispersing as quickly and mysteriously as it had begun. The way ahead, out of the city, was free and Christian moved the BMW with practiced ease on into the countryside. Ancient trees, autumn-kissed oaks and dull-green pines, made regimental play with the westering sun, flashing alternating light and shadow through the windows. Above, the cool, crisp sky was brushed by a steady wind that sent high, cumulous clouds running before it and ahead, along the very route Christian was taking. The way to the lake and, for a few days, away from everything and everyone, every problem and every headache---alone, except for Olliver.
It had taken all Christian's strength of will and body to keep it all going on track for this momentary respite from their complicated lives. Soon, very soon now, he would be able to let go his focus and really relax. He'd done his best to make it as painless as possible for Olli, taking on more and more of the vital chores as the weekend approached. So much so, that Olliver, himself, had become anxious and overly concerned about him. Christian frowned, recalling the argument they had had over it, just yesterday morning, gritting his teeth at himself as he felt a stab of guilt about it, again. As the sun set around them, the shadows of twilight seemed to fill the highway ahead with the same kind of gloomy remorse, mimicking his own regret.
Finally, he could withstand his own growing turmoil no longer. With determined nonchalance, he switched on the headlights and glanced at Olli. He had lapsed into contented silence, watching the scenery zooming by as they moved deeper into the woodlands. Now and again, Christian heard him sigh, an untroubled, neutral sigh and he felt another pang of guilt at the thought of disturbing him. Since the attack, the times he could recall Olliver so tranquil, so secure were rare and he wondered if he were being self-serving bringing up the argument again. But, he was fiercely certain he hadn't made it up to Olli properly. "Olli?", he said intentionally. Even he could tell his voice was full of purpose.
Olliver partially turned towards him, lolling on the car seat, completely reclined. In the faint light from the dash, and the occasional passing headlights, Christian could see nothing but affection and assurance shining from those eyes. He covered his own sudden welling-up of pure emotion at that expression by staring straight ahead, refusing to look. He knew he wouldn't be able to speak, otherwise.
"Hmm?", Olliver's voice came to him through the growing dark. Christian could barely hear it over the thrum of the motor. "What is it? You look worried."
Still, Christian saw that Olli had not moved, was still relaxed. Better get it over with, he thought, before we get to the cabin. He wanted nothing, nothing! to interfere with his intentions and though he knew Olliver was going to brush it off, he had already made-up his mind. "About yesterday...yesterday morning. I..uhh..." But Olli interrupted him, as he knew he would. He decided to let him, this time.
"Christian, man, I told you already: forget it. It was no big deal. I'm not made of glass, you know.", Olliver said with no hint of irritation, thankfully.
"Yes, I know. But, that's not the point. I was wrong, very wrong. To shout at you. I'm sorry.", he said and couldn't keep all of his emotion out of his voice, though he had tried desperately to do that. In the dark from the nearly empty highway, he felt his eyes water slightly and he had to blink to clear them. He was even more thankful for the night which concealed everything, nearly everything except what the BMW's harsh, chemical headlights revealed. "What kind of guy shouts at his lover like a stupid, insensitive jerk? Especially when you're still recovering..."
He cut himself off so quickly even he was stunned at the abruptness. Damn it!, he thought. We swore not to talk about that, to forget about it for the weekend.
Christian felt the quiet grow around him like a looming accusation, until Olliver finally spoke, "It's ok, man. I really mean that. I wouldn't have said that...I wouldn't say it now, if I didn't really mean it. You were just stressed-out, a little." Christian's explosive breath of self-recrimination, came as an interruption. Olliver's voice was smiling, "Ok, ok, you were way stressed, man. Whatever. It's over and done. I'm not thinking about it, don't want to think about it." Though it was full night, now, and very little could be seen and nothing smelt, still he looked round and sniffed as if taking in the scents. "It's so peaceful out here, isn't it? So free...", he said and his voice trailed off like a murmured chant.
But Christian was determined, "Don't change the subject, Olli, please. You never said you forgive me." There, he had said it though these words moved into dangerous territory. Well, not dangerous, exactly, but profound, nonetheless. He felt his heart telling him: not yet! Adrenaline made him squeeze the wheel as if he were trying to strangle it, trying to throttle the unspoken implications out of the plastic, itself, in lieu of his own throat.
And now, the silence between them became tight and impenetrable, with, felt Christian, unwanted undertones. Until Olliver spoke, "There's the turn off."
"Yeah", said Christian, seeing the sign. Deftly, mechanically, still churning with guilt and now sudden fear and excitement, he turned on to the country road which led down to the lake and the cabin and the beginning of it all.
to be continued...maybe
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 18, 2008 8:28:13 GMT -5
Thanks, lola
It's a case of 'not yet awake' for me.
I'll certainly write them all. That feels the most natural to me.
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 18, 2008 8:17:32 GMT -5
Thanks, all. Some great writing, here! Typically, I shy away from fanfic because, well, as much as I know fans really try their best to 'get into the heads' of the characters, most often, they just can't. Nothing wrong with that, of course. How could they since they didn't create the characters. Another problem is dialog: it usually jars me out of immersion. Happy to say, what I'm reading here never suffers these tragic mistakes. Really great work! Who knows, I might try one myself one day. Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 18, 2008 8:09:13 GMT -5
Hey, lola
I'll bite the bullet and do snail mail, but that street address for UFA isn't making much sense to me....can help? I don't see a city, etc. Or maybe I'm not awake yet.
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 18, 2008 7:59:56 GMT -5
Actually, it takes more effort, for me: Finding the proper linkage, translating the instructions and so on Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 18, 2008 7:34:52 GMT -5
Will do, lola Got an email addy, though? Geoff PS: found this link. It says Questions and Feedback: www.ufa.de/index.php/Kontakte/Kontakt/gesellschaft/1But part of the auto-form says 'news' so I'm a bit confused as to whether this is the right addy to email to. Of course, I've not had much coffee yet, this morning. ;D Oh, at the bottom, it's asking if you've read the privacy statement. ??
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 18, 2008 2:02:35 GMT -5
Yeah, it was great...especially since I got one of my questions answered....though lola wins that, hands down LOL As if it mattered. But, what's the deal with no Thore interview? man, that sucks Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 16, 2008 17:22:21 GMT -5
Congrats, Nanna! Love ya! Geoff
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 15, 2008 21:45:42 GMT -5
also, i'm mildly embarrassed to say i was getting paranoid as per various comments over the last few weeks about christian being/getting 'fat'. needless to say, im happy to see that shirtless christian is looking fit! of course, he doesn't have olli's six pack of death, but i am totally okay with that. To clarify so there is hopefully no misunderstanding: In the beginning, it was a joke because someone called him that on the blog and people then began to reference that sarcastically by calling TS/Christian "pudgy" in various terms. This was addressed a while back in the General Discussion thread but it was not meant as a critique of the character or actor but a commentary on those who called him fat or flabby. Also, there are others who believe that for a boxer, Christian didn't/doesn't come across as having the proper physique reflecting that fact. It's all about different intepretations but I don't recall... IIRC... anyone saying he looked bad overall, just not altogether ultra-fit or ultra-toned for being a boxer. A boxer's physique here in the States is overall much more defined muscularly. For Christian's weight-class, he should be much 'beefier' with a blatantly defined chest and larger biceps. Of course, that's here in the USA. Who knows how such things are done in Europe? Maybe there in national championships, the physiques of the athletes are expected to be different? Regardless, Thore/Christian definitely looks hunkier. It's obvious he's been working out, Jo/Olli as well. Both look in great shape, IMO. Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 15, 2008 16:05:05 GMT -5
I emailed them instantly, lola! Told them I'd rather have my eyes clawed out than have to watch a single second of an American Soap, but put on VL and I'd be glued. heh ;D
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 14, 2008 23:16:58 GMT -5
You go, boy! Christian's ready to fight, fight, fight! GREAT EPI! Thanks Ivan, TGL and Tihk! Jeeze, what is wrong with me? Whenever I see German guys angry, the handsome factor goes off the scale heh... I've mentioned this before, to my embarrassment, methinks. I loved this episode even Olli closing the door in Olivia's face. She needs to humbly apologize to them both. I, of course, LOVE Charlie no matter what scene she is in. She's wrong, of course. Ack! Did I type that out loud? Both of our guys looked so handsome, I could just hug them Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 12, 2008 10:14:36 GMT -5
I'm betting that Kai is Gay and eventually will turn evidence on the Neanderthal!
yay!
But, if he falls in love with Olli or Christian, I'll freak out!
;D Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 8, 2008 11:19:47 GMT -5
Ok, I'm going to have to do a full re-write. It's just not appropriate to say this in German to someone, apparently. Thanks, lola and hach for the expert advice Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 7, 2008 11:42:37 GMT -5
hah!
So that's why my German friend keeps saying 'kiss' sometimes when we are chatting! Alas, this is rarely said in English--at least where I'm from---because it's even more intimate than a 'hug' heh.
Maybe I could just mix in 'hug' in the German sentence? hehehehe.
I think I need a better way to express this.
thanks for the help
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 7, 2008 11:32:45 GMT -5
thanks, lola
It's not an actual hug, it's expressing a feeling that you would like to hug the person. An expression to add emphasis or more meaning to 'thank you very much' or to show a deeper, but not necessarily overly serious, appreciation for something they've said or done or are doing.
I'll try to write examples:
You are having an argument and a stranger steps in and comes to your aid out of the blue:
I could just hug you for saying <blah>!
You and the stranger realize you never actually will hug, but you are adding deeper thanks to the simple words: thank you very much.
I had this happen to me where I work. I work for an airline and after finally finding a male passenger's missing baggage (after 3 days), he came to pick-it-up at the counter. He kept saying thank you and then finally, added right as I give him the bags:
I could just hug you for getting these back to me! I really needed them.
He and I both knew he would never actually hug me---nor would I let him. But, he wanted to convey to me a deeper appreciation for what I'd done for him.
Make sense? Perhaps there is a better way to express this in German. Get rid of the whole 'hug' issue?
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 7, 2008 11:25:58 GMT -5
Heyyas, Soz!
*hugs*
Glad to meet ya! Finally, another O&C fan in my region! yay!
;D
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 7, 2008 11:13:26 GMT -5
You mean singular or plural you or polite and casual you? What is the exact context? Oh and I just thought of another one: "Komm(t) in meine Arme" (come into my arms). Yikes! In English, this is too personal/intimate. ;D Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 7, 2008 11:06:30 GMT -5
Scenarios: A good friend is leaving after a visit: I say, ok, later! Let me give you a hug... A couple arrives at a party which I know casually: Welcome to the party! Let me give you guys a hug! Someone I don't know, but I want to express casual affection for whatever they've done that I like (as in the case of Jo and Thore): Singluar: I just want to give you a hug Plural: I just want to give you a hug NOTE: this doesn't mean I'd actually do the hug, but that I have the feeling I'd like to hug these persons as a more overt form of a 'thank you very much'. That probably wouldn't be done in Germany, I realize---but here, in the South USA, it's become acceptable to at least say this----sometimes do it, if permission is given and the situation would logically warrant it. Like, "I could just hug you for <whatever>" heh. Thanks! PS: My friend would never come to these forums, thankfully. I hope he doesn't find out I'm double-checking his translation! heheheehe Geoff ;D
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 7, 2008 10:59:28 GMT -5
Yes, I trust him very much. I asked him to help me translate the letter in such a way that the distinctions between what I mean for the ACTORS and for their CHARACTERS is very clear. I also, as a Southern Boy, am very polite and very formal in my speech--even to very good friends. So, this mannerism of mine I also wished to convey.
The problem I have is trying, once again, to translate between these languages in a literal manner. Even when I know better!
Please, lola, which form of 'you' is proper in the phrase?
And, yes, I'm confused by your answer. I am right or he is? heh
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 7, 2008 10:14:21 GMT -5
Hey all!
I'm struggling with how to properly say: let me hug you (all of you or just a single person).
Lass euch in Arm?
I can't make it out in the episode, because Lydia says it too fast.
Lass mich dir? in meine Arme nehmen? Here, I'm sure of the proper form for 'you' in this case...grr. Should it be dich?
Please help.
Also, I'd like to point out that, in English (in the USA, my region at least) to say: let me take you in my arms, means something much more serious than, let me give you a hug!
In composing my letter to Jo and Thore, a German friend is helping me out and where I say:
I'd just like to give you a hug.
He translates this as:
"...ich wuerde dich einfach gerne in meine Arme nehmen."
I would just like to take you in my arms.
When I worried about this, he informed me this is how a casual 'hug' is spoken of, this is the way such a phrase is worded in German---it doesn't mean the same thing as the literal English phrase. The English phrase would mean something much more ahem, intimate and personal and I certainly do NOT wish to convey that to anyone but my lover! Certainly not to actors or people I do not know. Even if I did know them personally, I would never say this to them--as it means, well, like I said, it means I'm trying to be intimate. My friend says: I know what I'm doing, write it like I said.
heh
Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 7, 2008 9:38:55 GMT -5
IMO there is nothing wrong with wanting characters to behave in a certain way, whether it is realistic or not. I do want to point out that the road they chose doesn't feel unrealistic or out of character for me. Yeah. I'm just describing how I would deal with---or how I think I would. But, as brownsugar points out: it appears most people behave exactly like we saw the guys behave. But, because it is a soap, I guess some of us were wanting to see a different kind of response from both of the guys. Failing that, we project ourselves into the scenario---only natural, I guess. But, as I said, I still loved the episode because it evokes strange feelings from me. And that is the purpose of art, IMO. Geoff
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mgh48
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Post by mgh48 on Aug 7, 2008 2:07:09 GMT -5
lola, you have so many points in your rebuttal. I'm not sure which one to respond to.
Let's say this: though I've never been gay-bashed, I have been attacked. By more than one person at the same time. It was a cowardly attack and when I saw 4 or 5 ranged against me, I prudently left the scene. heh.
It's easy to say how you'd want to react in a situation; not necessarily how you would. I suspect the latter would be very hard to admit, indeed.
But, truthfully, I've never been attacked like I saw in yesterday's episode---so I have no idea how I'd react AFTER the fact. But during it, oh yes, I can definitely tell how I would react.
Geoff
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