Oliver & Christian Fan Fiction - Novels

[Torrid German Love]

This thread is only for novels (i.e. 50 000 words or more).
You don't have to write it all at once; it can be work in progress.
For stories less than 50 000 words, please use the other fan fic thread.
Enjoy!

[synapticmisfire]

Ambitious much? But I'd love to see if anyone does post fiction in here!

[lizg12]

The stuff I write at work runs about 15k words so 50K is about 4 'work' papers. And this is more fun

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 1, part 1

Christian got home early and unlocked the door to the quiet, dark apartment. And crashed into a box that hadn't been there this morning. Sighing, he felt along the wall for the light switch and flipped on the light. They hadn't finished unpacking, and now box #15 - all the boxes were numbered - was right in front of the door. He shouldn't have let Olli do all the packing. He had no idea what was in the box, but as he shoved it out of the way, he really hoped that whatever was inside was supposed to sound like broken glass.

Olli wasn't going to be home for another few hours. He'd called Christian earlier letting him know he'd be late tonight. Christian walked through the apartment, turning on lights as he went. He wasn't comfortable enough yet here to walk through in the dark.

Christian walked into the bedroom - smiling as he saw that Olli had tucked his old stuffed chicken under the covers. Only the head, resting on his pillow, peeked out from under the covers. He left the chicken alone, and changed his clothes.

Christian walked into the kitchen for a drink and a snack. He'd wait to eat dinner with Olli, but he was hungry. He grabbed something to drink and the rest of yesterday's dinner out of the refrigerator, and went to the honey pine table.

He didn't like the table much when Olli bought it, but he didn't argue after Olli pointed out that it was just like the one in the inn they stayed at when they went to Canada a few years ago. They'd done more than eat at that table.

He ate quickly, too nervous to slow down. He finished eating and sat at the table looking out at the evening sky.

Normally Christian didn't mind being alone for the few hours before Olli got home from work. But he'd been jumpy & unsettled all day and had hoped some time with Olli would settle him down. He wasn't really thinking sex, well not just sex, but being with him, touching him...

Christian jumped up, he couldn't sit still any longer. Just to be doing something, anything, he brought the dishes back to the kitchen and cleaned up. If he knew when Olli would be home, he would've started cooking something.

Restless, he wandered around the apartment. Unpacking an unending number of boxes was something to do, but he was too jumpy to decide where to put the things he unpacked. He was on the 3rd pass through the living room, thinking a run - a long run - might be a good idea, when he noticed the post card on the floor.

It must have fallen off the desk - a small pile of mail balanced on the edge. The card looked like some sort of advertisement. Christian picked it up without reading it and set it back on the pile of mail. He didn't realize that he'd turned it over as he put it down. He stared in shock at the face looking up at him from the postcard.

Coco.

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 1, part 2

He hadn't thought of her in years. Hadn't seen her since she left Dusseldorf and went to India about 10 years ago. She wasn't the first girl he dated, but she had been the last. They'd dated for a few years before she left, they didn't really end their relationship on good terms, but not painfully bad either.

He couldn't remember how they met, but she'd been a part of him during those horrific years he spent in prison. He rarely let himself dwell on that time, even though he still had nightmares about it sometimes.

Coco had been with him that first time. He'd been home maybe a month, they'd had dinner at her place and ended the evening naked in her bed. Too spent from the lovemaking to even think of moving, he loved having her warm body next to him and fell asleep holding her. And woke up screaming a few hours later. Coco was there, shaking him awake, her deep brown eyes filled with concern and fear. She'd never heard him yell like that that before. Her quiet voice soothing him, calming his racing heart, his rapid breathing.

It was months before the nightmares faded away. He'd never been quite sure what started them, or even now, years later, what occasionally brought them to the surface. He always found it strange that he'd never had one when he slept alone.

She had loved music, working as a DJ in clubs around the city and, once in a while, for private functions. He'd go to the clubs where she was working, not to dance - he didn't like dancing alone, and he wasn't going to pick up another girl with Coco watching from the DJ stand. But he liked being in the clubs, having a few drinks, watching the dancers and seeing Coco excited as she worked.

She was really good at choosing the right music, the right beat, to keep people dancing. She used to talk about it - how different places, different audiences, needed one kind of music over another. He didn't know music with the same intensity as she did, but he always agreed with her. He might not understand how she knew, but she was almost always right about what tempo, what song, was the best one to play.

They had a game they used to play when Christian visited a club she was working at. She knew he watched the dancers, and when she got home, she'd try to guess which dancer caught his attention the most. Some nights she guessed right, some nights she didn't. It was a way of spending the evening together, without really being together. He didn't stay all night, just a couple of hours, enough for a couple of drinks and maybe a little innocent flirting. He knew Coco noticed, but it didn't seem to bother her. But then, she was watching him and knew nothing ever happened.

One night, Christian had watched the same dancer the entire time he was at the club. Tight black pants outlining long lean legs. A snug bright blue top. Tight enough to see a body's outline underneath, but loose enough to move sensually to the loud beat of the music. Christian couldn't decide which of the people nearby was Blue Top's dance partner. Blue Top didn't turn toward the bar where Christian was sitting, but he didn't mind glimpsing those legs through the crowd of dancers or the sexy way Blue Top moved to the music. The flashing dance lights reflected off the bright blue fabric with each move.

Christian was sure Coco was going to have fun laughing at him later about how much time he spent watching Blue Top dance. Christian wondered how mad she'd get if he flirted with, and maybe danced with, Blue Top.

Just as this crossed his mind, Blue Top turned and headed for the bar. Toward Christian.

[I ♥ Blaine]

Is Blue Top Olli?
Please continue!
And soon!

[Torrid German Love]

lizg12, aaaarrrrggghhhhh! How dare you stop now??? ;D ;D ;D I have the same question as Thore's b*tch. Is it Olli? Oh God, you've got me hooked now!

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 1, part 3

Christian got a glimpse of long light blonde hair as Blue Top moved through the crowded dance floor. When he was younger, before he started dating, Gregor would tease Christian that he'd never get a date because he turned shy and wouldn't talk to the girls that really attracted him. Christian proved Gregor right by spinning around on the bar stool, turning his back to the dance floor and Blue Top.

A body brushed against him and a bright blue shirt appeared at his side. The bartender obviously knew Blue Top, he passed over a drink “one of these, right?” Christian nearly choked on his beer when he heard a deep voice – a deep male voice – answer “yeah, you're the best Jo, thanks.”

As Blue Top moved away, Christian whirled around to get a good look. At close range Blue Top was obviously male. Christian took a deep breath trying to beat back the flush warming his face.

He'd mistaken girls for boys, or the opposite, watching the dance floor before. He usually realized it pretty quick though, not half a hour later. He wasn't embarrased about mistaking Blue Top for a girl, but he'd imagined dancing with those legs, feeling those arms wrapped around him as they danced... stop. It's a guy, not a girl. A guy. Christian took another deep breath.

He finished his beer and went home, without talking to Coco. She never mentioned that night. Christian wondered if she'd even noticed he was there, he'd only stayed long enough to watch Blue Top dance.

Christian and Olli met not long after that night. Christian hadn't been comfortable around Olli then. He reminded Christian uneasily of Blue Top. The same long lean legs and an unconsciously sensual way of moving.

Christian smiled at the memory. He'd been rude and angry with Olli for months after they met. Which was a problem since they'd been roommates and lived together then. Olli probably had constantly been on eggshells around him. He never knew if Christian would be friendly or angry with him.

But even with Christian's confusing behaviour, Olli had fallen in love with him. Christian still, even 10 years later, couldn't understand it. He was thankful for it, but it didn't mean he understood how it happened.

Christian and Coco had started fighting and they both blamed Olli, somehow, as the reason for the fights. Ture, he had kissed Coco – but she'd been upset and angry and hurt with Christian. Olli had been comforting her, talking to her, holding her while she cried over Christian. And they'd kissed. Christian had always trusted Coco and he'd been furious when he'd found out about the kiss. It didn't help that Coco refused to tell him details about it.

He'd gone crazy imagining the kiss. Had it been a small kiss on the lips? A deep, passionate, 'forget the world exists' kiss? Had Coco wanted more than the one kiss? Was it just one kiss?

He'd talked to Olli about it once. Coco had hinted it happened at a party they'd both been at. Olli didn't say anything more than what Coco had told Christian. Christian wasn't sure what bothered him more about it all – that Coco had kissed sombody else, or was hiding it, or how she kept throwing it back in his face whenever they disagreed about something.

Somehow he'd found out it was Olli, not some unknown guy she'd met at a party. That really had hurt. They'd both lied to him about it. Especially since by then he knew Olli was gay and didn't expect him to kiss his girlfriend. Oh hell, even if Olli was straight, Christian wouldn't have expected Olli to kiss his girlfriend.

He and Olli had a big fight once he found out about the kiss. Christian stormed out of the apartment and went to the boxing club. He couldn't – and wouldn't – punch Olli or Coco, but that didn't stop him from thinking about it as he punched the heavy bags.

Olli came to the club and found him in the locker room after the workout. They'd argued more. And the next thing Christian knew was that he was pinned between the wall and Olli's lips.

[timmiitippii]

I'm still going * from when "Blue Top" called the bartender "Jo." Not to mix the real life actor with the character or anything, but while selectively reading, seeing Jo's name pop up caused brain to go into overdrive, especially with the comments above wondering if its Olli. *Loving the setting of 10 years in the future* Incredible work here =D

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 1, part 4 (don't get used to 2 posts in one day )

It was surprising, unexpected, shocking, rough - Olli was kissing him to shut him up, not to seduce him - and arousing. Realization that he was starting to enjoy the kiss jolted Christian and he shoved Olli away. A memory of Blue Top flashed though his mind. He'd roughly wiped his mouth with his boxing wrapped hands - not out of disgust but shock and anger.

He wasn't out then, not even willing to consider it, and he didn't want to. Not now, not here in a boxing club locker room. "Are you out of your mind!" Christian yelled at him, ignoring the tight twist in his gut as he as saw Olli's look of hurt at his reaction. What did he expect? That he'd pull Olli close and kiss him back? 

After taking a shower,  Chrstian was still shaken by the kiss. Coco appeared then at the club, looking for him. She tried to talk to him about her kissing Olli, about him and Olli fighting, but he wasn't in the mood to talk. He'd kissed her instead, an almost gentle, curious, exploring kind of kiss.

He wasn't sure exactly what he was thinking, just that he needed to do something to get the memory of Olli out of his mind. He pinned her to the wall and kissed her, her hands clutching his shoulders. Slowly, her hands slid down his back, across his chest, lightly tickling his belly. She loosened the towel around his hips and let it fall to the ground. 

Christian deepened the kiss and pressed closer to Coco. He knew that anyone could walk in at any minute but he didn't care, couldn't care, couldn't think, when Coco's soft warm hand wrapped around his hard cock, hot and wet from his shower. He groaned and moved against the fingers holding him tightly. He reached for her waist, to touch her, to feel her under his hands. He suckled her creamy neck, nuzzling her shoulder.

She pushed him back, away from her, away from the wall, just enough to kneel in front of him and take him in her mouth. He gave a deep moan as her lips tightened around him, sliding along his length. The only thing keeping him standing was his hands gripping the wall when he filled her mouth with his heat. 

He'd just wrapped the towel around his waist when 3 boxers came in talking about tomorow's soccer game.

They'd stopped fighting after that. Not entirely, but almost like it was before. He remembered Olli's kiss more than he wanted to, coming up in his dreams, his thoughts, even kissing Coco, brought Olli's kiss to mind.

She'd gotten the job offer in Goa soon after that. He'd  been in love with her, or thought he was. She was smart and funny and he really did enjoy being with her. Wasn't that all you needed?  Wasn't that love? He tried not to think about that little voice that argued that something was missing with her, that he needed more than what she wanted, what she could give.

He pretended not to notice that he didn't touch her as much as he used to. He'd even planned to go to Goa with her. He hadn't started school yet, and his only job was helping Gregor at No Limits, there wasn't anything really holding him back, needing him to stay in Dusseldorf.

[synapticmisfire]

I lack the technical knowledge to post a cheerleader emoticon, but woo! Go Liz! I'm very excited to see where this is going, and major respect for taking on such a huge challenge!

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 1, part 5

Then one afternoon he overhead Olli talking to his cousin Olivia. "I don't know what I'll do without Christian. How can he go to Goa?" That had shaken Christian to the core. He meant so much to Olli? He knew Olli had a crush on him, but to be so dejected about him leaving?

Christian and Olli weren't dating then, some days they'd barely been on speaking terms. Christian didn't want to even think that he was attracted to Olli, or that he might be gay.

But Christian couldn't deny, lying awake at night, in the dark stillness, that he did feel something for Olli. Something, that if he was talking about a girl, he would unhesitatingly describe as attraction. But Olli wasn't a girl. He was most definitely a man. With a heartbreaking smile, gorgeous green eyes, sexy legs .... Christian spent many sleepless nights thinking about Olli.

Olli's despair at Christian leaving was stronger than Coco's desire for Christian to go with her. She didn't seem really concerned if he followed her or not. She was going to Goa. Christian would come because it was expected - he was her boyfriend, after all. Or he would stay because it was expected - he was applying to school here and Gregor, his only family, was here .

Christian stayed in Dusseldorf and Coco went alone to Goa.

He never admitted that he'd stayed because of Olli.

Christian jumped when he heard a door slam shut. He looked toward the front door expecting Olli before he realized the slammed door belonged to one of the neighbors. As the sharp echo faded, Christian took a few deep breaths to calm his suddenly racing heart.

He'd lived in apartments most of his life and was used to hearing neighbors all around him. There were few noises that bothered him, and many he didn't even notice. But not being able to place where a door slam was coming from made his skin crawl.

It was one of the few things he didn't like about this new apartment. Door slams echoed through the building taunting Christian to place where the sound came from. He hoped the feeling would pass the longer they lived here. It's been less than a month, and he couldn't tell Olli they needed to move because he was spooked by the echo of a door being slammed shut.

He checked his watch - Olli wouldn't be home for another two hours at least. Christian considered going down to Schneider's and seeing Olli. But with Charlie on vacation, Olli would have his hands full. Christian had no doubt Olli would make time for him, but he didn't want to worry Olli by showing up unexpectedly.

Two hours was plenty of time for a run before Olli got home. And hopefully it would clear his head.

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 1, part 6
Christian opened the bathroom door and walked into the linen closet. Crap. In the old apartment, it was the bathroom door. Here, it wasn't. He was glad Olli wasn't around to start laughing at him. On the other hand, Olli had done the same thing at 3 in the morning only a few nights ago. Olli's cry of surprise at walking half asleep into a shelf of towels had woken Christian. He didn't stop laughing until Olli came back to bed and ... Christian grinned to himself at the pictures it conjured up. They'd both overslept the next morning after a late night, or maybe it was an early morning, of lovemaking.

Walking into the bedroom, Christian shook his head at Olli's uniform tossed carelessly over a chair. He hadn't noticed it earlier, and it was getting wrinkled. Olli was very careful to look good in his uniform - and he did, Christian's told him often how amazingly sexy he looks in Schneider's white and black uniform. It's changed a few times over the years, but it didn't matter what color it was, Olli still looked sexy in it. Actually, Christian thought smiling, Olli looked sexy in anything. And in nothing.

He hung up the uniform, smoothing out the wrinkles. His smile faded some, thinking of the discussion they'd had a few weeks ago about it.

"Come on, Olli, tell me. What do you want to do besides this?" Olli was getting dressed in his uniform, his shift due to start in an hour.

"What do I want to do? Get through the weekend so I can call that hotel first thing Monday. I really want to talk to the manager before I book our vacation there for the summer. The girl I talked to this morning was an idiot."

Christian sighed "No, Olli. I mean about working for Charlie. You want to keep waiting tables and bartending?" Olli looked at him in surprise. "Sure. I like working for Charlie. She's great to work with, the pay's good, the hours are good, and I like it."

"Oh come on, Olli. What do you really want to do? Do you really want to work there until you retire?" Christian's voice had taken on an edge of frustration. "Christian. We've talked about this before. I'm not doing it again." Olli said warningly.

Christian took a deep breath, "I just don't want you to be disappointed with life, Olli. That you gave up your dreams and got stuck behind a bar..."

Olli had walked over to him while he was talking and cupped his face, stroking his cheeks with his long graceful fingers. Christian closed his eyes, melting into his touch. Olli knew exactly how he'd react when he did that. "shhh. Christian, honestly, I'm a big boy - I'm 40 for god's sake. I never had big dreams of being, I don't know, Dusseldorf's top chef or something. I just did what I enjoyed, what I had fun with. Then we met, and, and, got our life together, that's all I want. Us. I'm fine. Really." Olli leaned over and kissed Christian. A kiss filled with love and desire and hinted of more to come.

Olli pulled back reluctantly, and grinned "of course, right now, I wouldn't mind not working for Charlie. Or anybody else for that matter."

Christian had grinned back and pulled Olli close for another kiss, "so you have something to think about at work today" he murmured against Olli's lips.

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 2, part 1

Christian stepped outside, thinking which way to go for a run. This apartment was close to their old apartment over No Limits, close enough that Christian could run the same streets, the same paths. His favorite run took him past Schneider's, but he knew if did that, he wouldn't stop himself from going in and seeing Olli. He turned left and headed out toward the park.

He ran past couples holding hands, young men and women heading to dinner before going to the clubs, businessmen walking to their hotels after a long day at work.

He ran with Olli sometimes, but he liked the solitary run tonight. It was a warm night, the almost full moon rising slowly ahead of him. A group of cyclists zoomed by, yelling at him to watch out as they circled around him.

The stress of the day melted away as he pounded the pavement, running, breathing, being. He took the path over the hill, remembering Judith's story long ago of Constantin lighting a path for her to the top of the hill. She'd been caught between him and Fabian then. She was studying architecture, and had just moved in with Christian and Olli. They'd had fun teasing her about her boy trouble, but it was easy to do, they had just fallen in love, in the giddy beginning of a new relationship.

Judith had gone to the top of the hill to find Constantin and a telescope. He had named a star for her, the telescope aimed at her star. Christian wondered if Constantin bought one for the baby last year. At the christening, Judith had been teasing Constantin that she couldn't be the only one in the family with a star. They'd had an anniversary party in their new house just a few months ago. Judith designed it and it was finished just in time. Judith was making a name for herself as a top architect, Christian was sure that even with her talent, marrying into the Lahnstein family hadn't hurt.

Christian ran past a group of young boys racing from tree to tree. They reminded him of his college entrance exam. It was one of the first in a long line of things Olli had done for him. And they hadn't even been a couple yet, in fact, he'd been dating Coco then. Olli had sent in his college application, without telling him, and had been there to when he ran for his exam.

Christian had been more nervous that day than he thought he'd be. But it was the last exam, the deciding factor if he'd be allowed to attend or not. Gregor had gone with him, but he was even more nervous than Christian.

After a few false starts, so many that he was on the verge of being disqualified, he'd looked up to see Olli's smile, Olli giving him the thumb's up. Christian was surprised to see Olli, since, as usual back then, they'd fought again. But he was glad that Olli was there. His calm confidence settled over Christian and he passed his exam. He started at the college just a few weeks later when the term started.

He ran out of the park and down the streets lit only by streetlights, car headlights, and the rising moon. He ran through these streets passing homes filled with light and families enjoying the early evening hours. Not much farther, the streets changed to restaurants and clubs coming to life as the moon rose higher. The steady beat of dance music was starting to drift through the city.

Christian wasn't far from No Limits. He knew Gregor would be there, and if he stopped in for a drink, Gregor was just as likely to hand him an apron and put him to work as he was to hand Christian a beer. Christian didn't mind helping Gregor, but he wanted to be home when Olli got home, and if he started helping Gregor, well, he'd be home even later.

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 2, part 2

Christian stopped his run at the corner to stretch out the beginning of a cramp in his left leg. He glanced up at the sound of voices and footsteps headed toward him. The two young men were deep in conversation and obviously didn't see Christian. He had just moved out of their path when they passed him. They were barely 25, if even that old, and clearly in love, arm in arm, walking with matching steps.

Christian chuckled, and shook his head at their total disregard of the world around them. He had no doubt that they wouldn't have noticed if they had bumped into him. He heard the young blond man say, “Let me get this straight. You told Antonio that you love me, but you can't, you WON'T say it to me!?” He was still talking, his voice fading as they moved away from Christian. Christian turned to watch them, the blond trying to move away from his companion who kept his arm firmly around the blond's waist.

Christian was tempted to go after them, to tell the blond that words weren't everything, that those words, sometimes, just weren't enough to capture the feelings, the desires, the total capture of one's heart and soul by another. Christian knew nothing about these two men, but it was obvious just in these few seconds watching the two together, that the red-haired man dearly loved the blond. Words weren't needed. Or rather, the blond needed to learn to read, to understand, the language of action, of movement, that his red-haired companion spoke.

It was a language that he and Olli had to learn too.

One late afternoon after a long workout at the gym, he and Olli stopped at No Limits for a snack before going home. He knew by then that he loved Olli, that Olli had his heart for all eternity. But Christian hadn't come out yet – not to his brother Gregor, or his boxing promoter Wolle, no one. Except Judith, she had known, even before Christian did, that he loved Olli. Judith easily understood that language of the unspoken.

Sitting in No Limits, playing with his food, Olli knew something was bothering Christian. Olli liked words, was more comfortable talking than Christian, but still he'd learned enough to recognize Christian's different moods. It had taken a few minutes but finally Olli broke through and got Christian to start talking.

“Olli, I feel like somehow I could burst. I'd like to run around, jump, dance...I'd love to dance a sirtaki with you right here. Because you give me the strength to do all this. The courage, pride... You just love me.”

Olli swallowed hard, knowing that in his own way, Christian had just said he was in love. Deeply in love with Olli. Not with the expected words, but with those words, those eyes, the expression on his face, Olli knew. He said, barely above a whisper “One more word and I'll start to cry.”

Christian went on, “Me too. Because I can't dance with you. Instead I have to pretend to Wolle that I think gays are gross. Betraying you. Betraying us.”

Olli shook in head, “Who cares what Wolle thinks? The main thing is that we know how we feel about each other.”

Christian sighed, and gave a small smile to the beautiful man sitting across from him, “You always know the right thing to say.”

Olli stood up, and leaned over Christian, “Good, in that case, lets go upstairs and dance.”

“Sirtaki or free style?”

“Neither - jogging. You haven't done your run today.”

“Ollliiiiiiii...” Christian groaned and followed his lover upstairs.

They changed into running clothes, went out for a run.

At about the 5k mark, Olli stopped to catch his breath. Christian stopped next to him, concern in his face. “I'm fine Christian, just need a minute.” Olli gasped out, stuggling to get his breathing under control. Christian laughed at him, assured that Olli was ok. After a few minutes, Olli ran off, slapping Christian on the ass, daring him to beat him to the alley's entrance a few hundred meters away.

Christian laughed again and followed Olli, easily passing him and winning the impromptu race. Olli pulled to a stop in front of Christian, breathing heavily. After catching his breath, Olli swallowed nervously, locked eyes with him, and said quietly, “I love you Christian.”

It was the first time he'd told Christian that in all seriousness. Not the infatuation he'd admitted to before, but love in the true sense. Christian had smiled, and gave a weak, “me too.” He knew that was inadequate, that Olli deserved the words, but he couldn't. He'd said them to Coco and other girls he dated, what he felt for Olli... was so much more intense, that “I love you” wasn't enough, weren't the right words, but he had no other words.

Christian took a deep breath and wrapped Olli in his arms, pulling him close. He sent a small prayer skyward, praying that even without the words that Olli needed, wanted, to hear, that Olli knew, that he understood that Christian loved him, heart and soul.

Christian closed his eyes and lowered his head to rest in the space between Olli's neck and shoulder. He could feel Olli's pulse, his hot skin, inhaling Olli's scent, made more intense by the sweat of their shared run.

Christian heard footsteps not too far away. Probably a businessman or tourist, lost in the streets of the city, looking for their hotel, or a restaurant serving a 'real' German meal. He never understood what it meant when tourists asked for that. Christian didn't want to move, didn't want to let go of Olli, didn't want to direct the lost tourist to any hotel or restaurant.

Without raising his head, or opening his eyes, he tightened his arms around Olli, pulling him closer, as he took a few steps backwards, into the alley and the night shadows, moving out of view of the footsteps. He heard the footsteps hesitate, and then fade away as the tourist wandered off in search of a restaurant.

[eldanesh]

wow Liz, thats really good!
i'm loving how this is going so far.

[viga2430]

Lizg12 your story is AMAZING! I am looking forward to the other part...

[lizg12]

Eldanesh and Viga2430 - Thank you!
Then and Now
Chapter 2, part 3

The morning after Olli's proclamation of love, and their shared hug in that dark alley, Christian's life careened out of control.

He met Wolle for breakfast at No Limits. As usual, Wolle quietly thrust a small bag of vials under the table to Christian. The steroids he thought Christian was taking as part of his boxing training. Christian said nothing, and slid the bag in his pocket. He never shot up the steroids, but he let Wolle think what he wanted. Christian trained hard and wanted to prove he could win fights clean.

Wolle started talking about his evening the night before. Christian was only half paying attention while he drank a coffee and played with the remains of his breakfast. “Uh, sorry, where were you?” Christian interrupted. Wolle gave him a stern look, “Pay attention, boy. You'll lose your fights if you don't focus” and repeated the names of the streets he walked last night. The same streets Christian and Olli used for their run. “And then, I saw two f*gs hugging. Out there! In public, in the street! Dirty, little...” Christian interrupted with a “Really? In the street?” trying to stop Wolle, trying not to look over at Olli sitting at the bar, watching them. How much of this could he hear?

“Yeah. I wasn't sure at first, one was a little thing, sort of like the fairy you live with.. but yeah, two nancy guys, I wanted to go over and punch...”

“You mean Olli? He's my roommate, not a fairy. So, um, what happened last night? You don't look any bruised up for a fight...”

“Yeah, yeah, what, you think a f*g would've fought back against me? Nahh. I didn't bother, when they realized I was there, they slunk into the shadows in the alley where they belong..”

“Uh, so yeah, about this fight coming up..” Christian was desperate to end this line of talk with Wolle. Christian was getting angry at his put-downs and insults of Olli and gays, the constant pressure to take the drugs, and he was afraid that the more Wolle talked about it, the greater chance that he would recognize Christian and Olli as the 'f*gs' hugging last night. Christian had already realized that Wolle was the 'tourist' he'd heard walking by.

“Yeah, yeah, I'm not sure if you're ready yet, but look, it won't do you any good if word gets around that you're living with a fairy. Get rid of the f*g. The sooner the better.”

Christian lost it at that point. He'd fired Wolle on the spot. In the middle of No Limits, with Gregor and Olli looking on. Christian didn't know how much they'd heard, but he couldn't be around Wolle any longer.

In less than two days, he'd fired his promoter, came out accidently to Gregor while in bed with Olli, fought with Gregor about his being gay and hired Gregor as his new promoter...

He shook his head to clear the memories. If he kept thinking about what happened then, he'd end up getting home in a foul mood and that wasn't why he'd come out for a run. If he'd wanted to be in a foul mood, he could've stayed in the apartment listening to the echoes of slamming doors.

He took a deep breath and finished his stretches. The cramp had loosened up and he started off at a slow pace, gradually running faster through the streets of Dusseldorf.

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 2, part 4

He pushed himself, running faster, just running and not thinking. If he ran fast enough, he wouldn't have to think. Just breathe. Run and breathe. He settled into the run, feeling himself start to mentally relax even as his body worked relentlessly to keep him running.

Christian didn't know how long he'd been running when he slowed to a stop at the intersection. Jogging lightly in place while the cars zoomed past, he glanced at his watch and cursed. It was later than he thought. He looked around, getting his bearings and working out the shortest route back home.

Luckily, even though he hadn't been paying much attention to where he was going, he instinctively had run a route that brought him close to home. He had circled around the city and was almost back at the park he ran through earlier.

During a break in the traffic, he cut across the street and headed left. Soon he was back in the park, running down a different path than he took earlier. He didn't mind running the hills throughout the park, but at the end of a run, he preferred the flat paths.

His shoulder was starting to bother him, but nothing that a hot shower wouldn't fix. As much as he wanted to see Olli, he didn't want him to know his shoulder hurt from the run. Olli would be furious if he knew Christian pushed himself that hard. The doctor had told him just a few days ago to be careful for another month or so until it healed completely. It was bad enough that he couldn't work out at the boxing club, he wasn't going to stop running too.

Christian came to a stop in front of the building they'd just moved into. Olli had been the one that wanted to move. It was something they'd talked about for a while, but the old apartment was comfortable, and close to where they both worked. Maybe a little too close to Gregor though – he lived across the hall and sometimes he forgot that Christian wasn't the timid 8 year old boy he'd had to protect from the older boys at school. And Gregor took advantage of the fact that one of his No Limits sometimes-employee lived just upstairs. But Olli had been right, the two of them living in an apartment designed for 4 or 5 adults, was a bit much. Most of the bedrooms rarely got used, just when friends needed a place to stay for a few days.

Christian went upstairs and breathed a sigh of relief that he'd gotten back before Olli. He hadn't left a note that he was out for a run and he knew Olli would've have been concerned if he came home to an empty apartment. He went into the kitchen and took a long drink. He'd forgotten to take a bottle of water with him, and it had been a long run and a warm evening.

He'd also forgotten his phone when he left for his run. He checked it and found no new messages. Good, that meant Olli would be home soon. Christian had time for a quick shower before starting to cook something for dinner.

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 2, part 5 (Tuesday's part, a few hours early - it maybe Thursday before I get back online though)

Christian walked into the bathroom and stripped off his clothes, tossing them in the general direction of the laundry hamper. He turned on the water and stepped under the rapidly heating water. He let the hot spray run over him, moving slightly to get his sore shoulder under the spray.

It occurred to him that this was his first uninterrupted shower since moving in. Olli usually decided he needed a shower about the time Christian got under the water. On the other hand, Christian thought smiling, he also got the urge for a shower whenever Olli was standing naked in a steamy room under a cascade of hot water.

At least, now, Christian can breathe and speak coherently to Olli when he's wearing nothing, or nothing more than a towel around his waist.

Christian and Olli were alone in the apartment - in that awkward between time, after Olli admitted his crush on Christian but before they started dating - and Christian had walked in on Olli as he got out of the shower. He'd barely been able to gasp out a coherent conversation with Olli's standing nude in front of him.

Olli had taken his time drying off before wrapping a towel around his waist. The towel had considerably improved Christian's breathing and language capabilities, but still, the sight of Olli's taut muscular body within reach had scrambled Christian's feelings and left him more confused than ever.

He and Olli had talked about it once. Olli, not a stupid man, had quickly picked up on Christian's confusion and 'respiratory problems' as he called it. So Olli had teased him a bit, drying off slowly, making sure Christian had a full frontal view of Olli as he wrapped a towel around himself.

When he splashed on his cologne, he'd stood so close that Christian could feel the heat of the shower rising off his body. Olli admitted he'd nearly started bleeding from biting the inside of his cheek. Hard, so he wouldn't burst out laughing. Or kissing Christian. That had been very tempting, Olli had told him, but he was afraid that would've gotten him a right hook to the jaw.

Christian stood a little longer under the water, enjoying the feel of the water washing over him. He'd have to get out soon and get dressed. He started thinking what to make for dinner. It was late for a heavy meal, but knowing Olli, he probably hasn't eaten anything except bar mix nuts - or whatever Charlie was serving nowadays - for the last eight or ten hours. It was probably part of how Olli stayed so slim, although he put in time in the gym and the jogging trails.

'yaaaaaahhhhhhh' Christian yelped in shock.

[eldanesh]

hey liz! This is really good. i hope it's Olli that made him yell like that

[viga2430]

Lizg12, OMG why did Christian yelp? I hope it is Olli also...I guess we have to wait and find out!

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 2, part 6

(Apologies for any (more than usual) wierd grammar/spelling/etc. I wrote this part, and part of the next, in the hospital's family room waiting for my husband's day surgery to finish. I may come back and edit it later.)

Christian stumbled forward, away from the sudden cold against his back. His feet slipped on the wet floor of the tub. The only thing that stopped him from falling were the muscled arms wrapping around his waist, steadying him under the hot water. "Damn it Olli, why are your hands so freaking cold??"

Olli was laughing too hard to answer. He finally gasped, "I'm sorry, I didn't know.... " and pushed Christian out from under the direct stream of water. "Move over, so I can warm up." his laughter petered out as he closed his eyes and tilted his face up to the streaming water.

"What time is it? I haven't been in here that long, have I?" Christian asked, watching Olli's skin slowly turning pink in the heat.

"Huh? No, it's not that late. It was a quiet night, so I ducked out early. " Olli turned around, letting out a small groan as the water rolled down his back. Or maybe it was the way Christian's leg slid against his.

Christian leaned back against the slippery wet tile. "Won't Angelo be upset?" he asked while thinking how odd it was to be in the shower talking about one of Olli's co-workers instead of pulling him close and... Olli must've been thinking the same thing, he turned to Christian, and gave him a kiss, his tongue running lightly across Christian's lips.

Christian's hand came up and pulled Olli closer as he deepened the kiss.

Olli broke free, "He left early yesterday. Today was my turn if it was quiet. Don't tell Charlie," he said laughing.

Christian gave Olli a sly look. "What are you going to pay for my silence?" He slid around Olli, his chest brushing along Olli's back, and stood under the water stream to rinse off the last of the soap.

"You're blackmailing me?" Olli said in mock horror, grinning at Christian, who smirked back.

"Yep. What are you going to do about it?" Christian turned off the water and leaned against the wall, shivering slightly against the cooling tile. He was smiling at Olli, his dimples in full view.

Olli stepped closer and took Christian's face in his hands, caressing the hot wet skin. His lips covered Christian's, his tongue pressing for entrance. Christian's hands went to Olli's hips, pulling him closer. Deep soft groans filled the small bathroom.

When they finally broke apart, Christian murmured, "ok, that's good for a few days. I won't tell Charlie until next..." Olli bent his head and nuzzled Christian's throat, just above his collarbone, cutting off whatever he was about to say. Christian moaned instead, his fingers grasping at Olli's wet hair.

"You were saying? " Olli lifted his head to look at Christian.

"Not a word, I'm not saying a thing" he pulled Olli close and kissed his warm shoulder, licking the drops of water sliding over the lean muscles.

"Christian?"

"mmmh?"

"um, as much as I'm , uh, yeah, right there, um, I ..." Olli's stomach growled "haven't eaten since breakfast" he finished sheepishly, over Christian's laughter.

They ate dinner at the honey pine table, Olli's fingers occasionally tracing a knot in the wood. "So, you ok, Christian?"

He looked at Olli in surprise, "Sure, I don't want you passing out from hunger while we're in the shower," he said laughing, "You can pay me the rest of the 'blackmail' after we eat."

Olli laughed too. "Thank you, always so considerate!" He stopped laughing before continuing, "what I meant was, ARE you ok? You sounded, I don't know, strange somehow, when we talked this afternoon. It's one reason I left Charlie's early, I wanted to be sure you were ok."

"And you do that by scaring me half to death in the shower? " Christian gave Olli a look of disbelief.

Olli stifled a sigh. He knew Christian well enough that this could very quickly turn into an argument about nothing they had started talking about.

"Hey, I didn't know you'd be so surprised. I've walked in on you plenty of times before and that's not what you usually do ." Olli flashed him a smile, hoping to avoid a fight. He didn't know what was bothering Christian, but a fight was not a good way to find out.

Christian nodded in agreement. "How'd you know I'd be in the shower anyway? "

Olli smiled "It was good luck, and perfect timing!" Christian just shook his head.

[lizg12]

Then and Now
Chapter 3, part 1

"How far did you run tonight?" Christian looked at Olli in surprise then smiled as he realized again, just how well Olli knew him. "Longer than I planned to, about an hour and a half, so maybe 10k? "

"Did you come by Charlie's? You should've stopped in," Olli was just making small talk until he could figure how to get through to Christian.

"No, I went through the park" and told Olli about the conversation he overheard of the blond young man getting upset with his redhaired boyfriend.

"You really would've gone after and told them that?" Olli asked when Christian finished. "Yeah, no. No. I mean I was right about their age when we first started dating, and I wouldn't have paid any attention to a crazy jogger coming up to us and talking about how to talk about love without saying 'the' words."

Olli nodded, conceding the point. "On the other hand, you were, still are, really good about that kind of thing "

"Yeah, like what?" Christian asked him, curious.

Olli looked up at Christian – they were relaxing on the couch, Olli's head in Christian's lap, Christian's fingers lightly running through his hair.

Olli smiled at him, “hmmm, the first time, or the time last week or ...” Christian bent down and silenced him with a kiss. “The first time. I don't remember.”

“OK. I didn't realize until later though.”

“Later? So I wasn't very clear? I hope I've gotten better at it!”

“Oh yeah, you do just fine. And I was still, hm, learning? about you.” Olli thought about it, hoping he remembered the words right, “you said I was cute and that you didn't want to kiss me because you didn't want to hurt my feelings” He burst out laughing at the confused expression on Christian's face.

“I said what? I mean, you are cute, but...”

“Oh come on. Don't you remember how we started dating, Gast84?” Olli teased him with the long-ago nickname.

Olli had been going to the gay chat room for a few months, meeting a few people online, but no one that really captured his interest for more than one or two chats. He decided to give the chat room one more visit before quitting the site.

“Hi, this is my first time on this site and I've no idea why I'm here. A guy I know kissed me a short while ago. At that time I was still with a wonderful woman, and I loved her. But that kiss. Am I gay now because I can't forget about being kissed by a man?” popped up on the screen.

Olli was intrigued. Gast84 sounded confused, a little lost, and maybe scared at what it could mean. He knew the feeling from when he came out years before.

They started chatted almost daily. Olli always had his laptop nearby, and stayed signed into the chatroom, waiting for Gast84 to show up. Olli tried to convince young Gast84 to talk to the man interested in him. “You should definitely try talking about it with your crush. Maybe he's just waiting for you to take the first step” But Gast84 never did, “I don't think I'm ready to do that yet,” or “I didn't have the guts to do it - as usual.”

Olli found himself telling Gast84 about his crush on Christian. Given Gast84's inexperience with dating men, Olli didn't expect him to have any advice, but it was comforting to be able to talk about Christian with someone who could, in some way, understand. And Gast84 did try to comfort him when Olli was down about his non-relationship with Christian “you shouldn't give up because even the stupidest guy will realize how cute you are.”

One day after Gast84 told him about the evening that he and his 'sweetie'- as Olli always called him – spent together, with Gast84 again not saying anything about his feelings, Olli had suggested trying something different.

“Kiss the guy again, Gast84. What you've been doing hasn't worked, you have to try a different tactic. Either way, afterwards you'll know – either he leaves you cold and you look for a new girlfriend or it's hot again and you know you're just as interested in him as he is in you.”

Gast84's answer had been disbelief “are you daft?” and a surprising amount of concern for his 'sweetie'. “But, you know, the guy has admitted he's into me, if I kissed him just to find out how I feel, what if I later realize that for me, there's nothing there? I can't do that to him.”

The next day Olli had sent Gast84 his picture.

Gast84 was Christian.

“I know you weren't talking to ME, exactly, but you cared about, and I think loved, Halunke, who was me. And you were talking about me. Of course, then you broke my heart when you told me that it was all 'just an experiment and that sex with women was better' ” Olli told Christian, pretending to sulk.

“Ok, so I was an idiot then. Can I make it up to you?” Christian traced Olli's pouting lips with a warm fingertip.

[timmiitippii]

That you so much liz for continuing this story. It is realli wonderful =]